What the boys in the ocean whispered to me today...

Storms & Opportunities.

This morning I sat & watched a bunch of surfers…

I’m not a surfer so I can’t say whether any of this is actually true but here’s what I learned with my eyes & my heart. Watching them offered me deep insight for humaning, hopefully, you’ll find it helpful too.

The surfer has no control over the wave, how big it is, how it moves & when it comes.

The surfer’s experience of the wave seems dependent on 2 key things.

1. LOCATION

He needs to know exactly where he is in relation to the wave when it forms. His location is crucial. Every wave is different, he can’t fully anticipate what’s coming he can only respond based on where he is & he needs to KNOW where he is in order to create optimal ease & the best experience possible of the wave. He watches & pays attention to put himself in an ideal position for ‘potential’ waves, knowing he has no control over the ocean.

2. CHOICE

How he chooses to be WITH the wave. Every tiny choice he makes is the make or break of his experience. If the wave is just forming his best option is to just float right over it. If he doesn’t realise that he’ll paddle like crazy & waste energy & still just float right over it. If it’s too close he needs to choose to dive right into it & go through it. If he doesn’t he’ll just get smashed. He needs to choose when to paddle, which direction to take, when to glide (I don’t know what they call that) when to stand etc

There were a few surfers out, & sure, there’s a bit of luck re where you are when a ‘good’ wave comes. One guy appeared to have all the luck though, it sparked my interest so I watched closely & observed the choices they all made. This guy knew where he was in relation to every wave & whilst he didn’t attempt to ride all the waves he knew how to get into the best position to increase his window of opportunity. He seemed to only choose the waves that he felt good about… I don’t know, maybe good about where he was in relation to it & good about his ability to ride it. He made choice after choice to go WITH the waves. He didn’t seem to struggle with any of it, he watched, he chose & he took action. Even when it wasn’t a great wave & it didn’t pan out into an epic ride, he kind off just went with it & it all seemed to gently dissipate around him. Such mastery.

Some seemed to attempt every wave, no matter where they were. There was a sense of desperation like a dog gets when you start throwing a ball. That hasty… yes, pick me, my turn, I want this one, I want ALL of them. That wasted energy just tired them out & got them pummelled over & over.

Some didn’t attempt anything, it felt like they were out there purely in defence mode. They ploughed through/under every single wave that came, regardless of the potential opportunity. Maybe fear or inexperience but it didn’t look fun.

As I watched I began to imagine the waves as the metaphorical opportunities & storms of life.

We can’t control opportunities or storms, there’s no way of knowing how big they’ll be or how they’ll play out. Knowing where we are in relation to them is key in order to make active choices to optimise our experience of them. In order to know where we are we need to get super honest with ourselves & to navigate accordingly.

If I’m faced with a storm & it’s right here & on top of me, if I try to paddle away (run) it’s going to smash me to pieces & the more I try to escape it the worse it will get & cost me way more energy. If the storm is already here the difficult & scary option is to dive right in & go through that puppy. *Side note: it’s the same deal with a straight up emotion, they literally only last 90 seconds if we choose just to FEEL it. Running/trying to fight it elongates the suffering. Know where you are in relation to the storms. 

Hmmm, there’s a storm but here I am, slightly ahead of it, I can just float right over this one. Or you could make a big deal & start paddling for no reason & waste your energy. Or you could just plough through every wave as if all of life is a storm.

Where am I in relation to this storm? What do I want? 

When you know where you are it’s easier to make a choice that will have you through it or over it without wasting your energy or intensifying your suffering… Depending on where you are you could even take the chance to ride that storm, to go with it, to stand up at the right moment & ride that baby all the way back to shore believing in yourself in a way you never have before.

If we also imagine the waves as life’s opportunities… Where are you? Are you way out the back beyond the breaks just watching others catch opportunities? Are you paying attention?  Are you moving WITH the flow of the water? Are you positioning yourself to maximise the possibility of opportunity? Where are you at energetically, physically, emotionally, mentally & relationally? Who are you spending your time with? What are you spending your time, energy & focus on? Are you like the desperate guy paddling like a mother fucker trying to catch every single opportunity, even if it’s not a good match for you? Does your current location (as in where you’re at in your life) mean this isn’t an ideal opportunity for you? Or are you the guy ploughing headfirst into every opportunity because you don’t believe you’ll find the right one for you?

What if storms & opportunities are actually the same thing?

What if they’re just the waves of life & we simply need to learn how we want to navigate them?

Knowing where we are RIGHT NOW.

Knowing what we TRULY want.

Choosing it.

Taking the next obvious step toward it.

F.FIND.

R.REFINE.

E.EMBODY.

E.EVOLVE.

F.R.E.E. Thyself

Please note: anytime I ever use ‘YOU’ in my writing, I always mean WE/I.

Also, if you’re a surfer & what I’ve observed is completely incorrect… I’m sorry but the metaphor still works. If you want to add to this please do in the comments.

Big Love xxx